As a young child, each of us was curious—the consummate explorer. We were open to the new, the magical, the aliveness and the wonder of life. We had no settled mis-perceptions, no mis-conceptions of reality, no expectations or paradigms to limit or prescribe our view of the world. Just curiosity and wonderment.
As we get older, all that stops. We are taught how to think and act in ways that are ‘appropriate’ for our age and the society in which we live. The fortunate ones subvert the brainwashing and find ways to allow their curiosity and wonderment to thrive. All the rest give in and allow their curiosity and sense of adventure to wither away. As Albert Einstein said, “It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.”
As we grow older still, we fall easily into habitual ways of living. We grow tired and slip into the comfort of a routine. We no longer choose to take risks, to look beyond the immediate and step off the well-worn path of the ‘tried and true’, the familiar, the comfortable, the safe. Ours is a culture rife with boredom: lots of repetitive activity, little curiosity. What there is in the way of curiosity is blocked by hubris—that obsessive pride based on an “I know it all” approach to life that closes down the imagination, stifles innovation and leaves us always where we have already been.
Monday, 27 April 2009
Friday, 24 April 2009
The Language of Leadership
Listen carefully. Your manager is telling you how he or she sees your relationship. What we call things tells the world the hidden truth about how we think. In the world of work, the language leaders use to describe their subordinates reveals the true nature of the relationship between them—the hidden dynamic underneath any surface politeness.
Why do some leaders describe the corporation as a family? Why do others use sporting terms (“We’re a tightly-knit team”); or military jargon (“This is D-Day. We need maximum effort from everyone”); or even religious terms (“I want everyone singing from the same hymn-sheet”)?
I don’t think it’s chance. What’s in your mind unconsciously expresses itself in the words you use—something Sigmund Freud pointed to many years ago that has passed into the language as the term ‘Freudian slip’.
Some more examples of significant leadership terminology
• Macho language and sayings come naturally to macho leaders. You often hear them talking about subordinates who “can’t stand the heat” or describing their own role as “kicking butt.” They love winning, in any forum, so they slip just as easily into the terms you would expect of any ultra-competitive situation: “winning is all that matters,” “I’m only interested in results,” or “he (or she) was never a contender.”
• Command-and-control autocrats love to use fighting terminology. If you hear expressions like “being in a fire-fight,” “taking out the bad guys,” or the need to “come out swinging,” you know you have a leader whose mind sees the world as a series of fights to be won and enemies to be vanquished. To natural fighters, winners are heroes, losers are beneath contempt.
• Speed freaks betray their obsession in rapid delivery and characteristic language. They constantly urge those around them to “cut to the chase,” “hit the ground running,” “give me the bottom line,” or “expedite” things. Nothing annoys a speed freak more than being asked to be patient or take time out to listen when there is action to be attended to.
• ‘Greed freaks’ always want to talk about money and rewards. They want to know “where the leverage is” and “what’s in it for me?” They demand to be told the benefits before they will listen to anything else. Discussion bores them, but they will spend hours poring over spreadsheets and projections. They also expect everyone else to be motivated solely by cash and are bewildered when they encounter anyone who is not.
• Habitual talk of teams, liberally laced with sporting terms and analogies, reveals the leader who sees him or herself as somewhere between team captain and coach. That gives the leader license to bully or weed out ‘weak links’ in the team, throw tantrums on the sideline, shout out playing instructions all the time, expect everyone to accept that he or she knows the game better than they do, and determine the ‘game strategy’ the whole team will follow without question.
• Patriarchs (and matriarchs) describe the rest of the organization as a ‘family’ and handle them accordingly. Like genuine family relationships, this can be two-edged. For every set of loving, caring and supporting ‘parents’, there will be the demanding and dysfunctional ones who try to control every aspect of family life, use guilt as a weapon, demand obedience at all times and treat unapproved behavior as the tantrums of naughty children, to be punished ‘for their own good’. Few people can be as simultaneously cruel and sanctimonious as a domineering parent.
Habitual patterns of language reveal any leader’s assumptions and their attitudes to the supervisory relationship. What you say shows how you think. How you think determines what you do.
Since these relationships are inevitably reciprocal, macho leaders demand timid, compliant followers. To a macho leader, anyone who won’t be led is a rival and a threat. Patriarchal leaders need to see themselves as the ‘fathers’ of a business ‘family’, so anyone who opposes them is going to be treated like a naughty, rebellious child in need of a healthy dose of discipline. Autocrats need disciplined followers who react to orders with a salute and cheerfully sacrifice themselves when called upon to do so.
Why do some leaders describe the corporation as a family? Why do others use sporting terms (“We’re a tightly-knit team”); or military jargon (“This is D-Day. We need maximum effort from everyone”); or even religious terms (“I want everyone singing from the same hymn-sheet”)?
I don’t think it’s chance. What’s in your mind unconsciously expresses itself in the words you use—something Sigmund Freud pointed to many years ago that has passed into the language as the term ‘Freudian slip’.
Some more examples of significant leadership terminology
• Macho language and sayings come naturally to macho leaders. You often hear them talking about subordinates who “can’t stand the heat” or describing their own role as “kicking butt.” They love winning, in any forum, so they slip just as easily into the terms you would expect of any ultra-competitive situation: “winning is all that matters,” “I’m only interested in results,” or “he (or she) was never a contender.”
• Command-and-control autocrats love to use fighting terminology. If you hear expressions like “being in a fire-fight,” “taking out the bad guys,” or the need to “come out swinging,” you know you have a leader whose mind sees the world as a series of fights to be won and enemies to be vanquished. To natural fighters, winners are heroes, losers are beneath contempt.
• Speed freaks betray their obsession in rapid delivery and characteristic language. They constantly urge those around them to “cut to the chase,” “hit the ground running,” “give me the bottom line,” or “expedite” things. Nothing annoys a speed freak more than being asked to be patient or take time out to listen when there is action to be attended to.
• ‘Greed freaks’ always want to talk about money and rewards. They want to know “where the leverage is” and “what’s in it for me?” They demand to be told the benefits before they will listen to anything else. Discussion bores them, but they will spend hours poring over spreadsheets and projections. They also expect everyone else to be motivated solely by cash and are bewildered when they encounter anyone who is not.
• Habitual talk of teams, liberally laced with sporting terms and analogies, reveals the leader who sees him or herself as somewhere between team captain and coach. That gives the leader license to bully or weed out ‘weak links’ in the team, throw tantrums on the sideline, shout out playing instructions all the time, expect everyone to accept that he or she knows the game better than they do, and determine the ‘game strategy’ the whole team will follow without question.
• Patriarchs (and matriarchs) describe the rest of the organization as a ‘family’ and handle them accordingly. Like genuine family relationships, this can be two-edged. For every set of loving, caring and supporting ‘parents’, there will be the demanding and dysfunctional ones who try to control every aspect of family life, use guilt as a weapon, demand obedience at all times and treat unapproved behavior as the tantrums of naughty children, to be punished ‘for their own good’. Few people can be as simultaneously cruel and sanctimonious as a domineering parent.
Habitual patterns of language reveal any leader’s assumptions and their attitudes to the supervisory relationship. What you say shows how you think. How you think determines what you do.
Since these relationships are inevitably reciprocal, macho leaders demand timid, compliant followers. To a macho leader, anyone who won’t be led is a rival and a threat. Patriarchal leaders need to see themselves as the ‘fathers’ of a business ‘family’, so anyone who opposes them is going to be treated like a naughty, rebellious child in need of a healthy dose of discipline. Autocrats need disciplined followers who react to orders with a salute and cheerfully sacrifice themselves when called upon to do so.
Thursday, 26 March 2009
Wednesday, 25 March 2009
What organizations and leaders claim they do
(The Merchant Mindset )
Value initiative and enterprise
Accept dissent as a way to improve things
Act honestly and respect contracts
Avoid force in favor of voluntary agreements
Stay open to new ideas
Collaborate easily with others
Seek open competition
Reward efficiency, thrift and industriousness
Stay optimistic
Use incentives linked to specific outcomes
What many of them actually do
(The Guardian Mindset)
Value discipline and obedience
Require loyalty and extract vengeance
Accept deception for the sake of getting the job done
Reject trade-offs and use force to gain desired ends
Value tradition
Protect exclusivity and treat strangers with suspicion
Seek opportunities to display personal prowess
Be ostentatious and protect honor
Be fatalistic
Dispense largess and patronage
Value initiative and enterprise
Accept dissent as a way to improve things
Act honestly and respect contracts
Avoid force in favor of voluntary agreements
Stay open to new ideas
Collaborate easily with others
Seek open competition
Reward efficiency, thrift and industriousness
Stay optimistic
Use incentives linked to specific outcomes
What many of them actually do
(The Guardian Mindset)
Value discipline and obedience
Require loyalty and extract vengeance
Accept deception for the sake of getting the job done
Reject trade-offs and use force to gain desired ends
Value tradition
Protect exclusivity and treat strangers with suspicion
Seek opportunities to display personal prowess
Be ostentatious and protect honor
Be fatalistic
Dispense largess and patronage
Emerging is ...
A FANTASTIC PIECE FROM JONNY BAKER'S BLOG
Christian communities that emerge out of very particular cultural contexts where the traditional church is basically irrelevant. These cultural contexts are more often than not urban, youngish, and post-modern.
Emerging church is not a worship style. I know emerging churches that do traditional liturgy with jazz (Mercy Seat), who use electronica (Church of the Beloved), who are a capella Gregorian chant (House for All Sinners and Saints), and who do nothing but old-time Southern gospel (House of Mercy).
So, when traditional churches in the suburbs are wanting to attract young people (with all the good intentions in the world) and they ape some kind of worship style they read about in a Zondervan book by starting an “emerging” worship service, it’s a bit … ironic.
There is nothing ideal about these communities. Yes, we need more generational diversity. And yes, we have the same number of issues and problems as other churches. All I know is that about 95% of the people who come to my church were not actually going to any church at all when they joined us.
Okay, now before you leave me angry responses let me say that this is not saying there is something wrong with the traditional church. Traditional church is often a faithful expression of Christian community. But people in my scene would have to culturally commute from who they are to who the traditional church is.
Christian communities that emerge out of very particular cultural contexts where the traditional church is basically irrelevant. These cultural contexts are more often than not urban, youngish, and post-modern.
Emerging church is not a worship style. I know emerging churches that do traditional liturgy with jazz (Mercy Seat), who use electronica (Church of the Beloved), who are a capella Gregorian chant (House for All Sinners and Saints), and who do nothing but old-time Southern gospel (House of Mercy).
So, when traditional churches in the suburbs are wanting to attract young people (with all the good intentions in the world) and they ape some kind of worship style they read about in a Zondervan book by starting an “emerging” worship service, it’s a bit … ironic.
There is nothing ideal about these communities. Yes, we need more generational diversity. And yes, we have the same number of issues and problems as other churches. All I know is that about 95% of the people who come to my church were not actually going to any church at all when they joined us.
Okay, now before you leave me angry responses let me say that this is not saying there is something wrong with the traditional church. Traditional church is often a faithful expression of Christian community. But people in my scene would have to culturally commute from who they are to who the traditional church is.
Tuesday, 24 March 2009
Efforts at change
(from an Intro to a Alan Hirsch article. Worthy of thought!)
One of the foremost signs of present-day society is the presence of increasingly complex systems that permeate just about every aspect of our lives. The admiration we feel in contemplating the wonders of new technologies is tinged by an increasing sense of uneasiness, if not outright discomfort. Though these complex systems are hailed for their growing sophistication, there is a increasing recognition that they have also ushered in a social, commercial, and organizational environment that is almost unrecognizable from the perspective of standard church leadership theory and practice.
Although we often hear about successful attempts to revitalize existing churches, the overall track record is very poor. Ministers report again and again that their efforts at organizational change did not yield the promised results. Instead of managing new, revitalized, organizations, they ended up managing the unwanted side effects of their efforts. At first glance, this situation seems paradoxical. When we observe our natural environment, we see continuous change, adaptation, and creativity; yet our
One of the foremost signs of present-day society is the presence of increasingly complex systems that permeate just about every aspect of our lives. The admiration we feel in contemplating the wonders of new technologies is tinged by an increasing sense of uneasiness, if not outright discomfort. Though these complex systems are hailed for their growing sophistication, there is a increasing recognition that they have also ushered in a social, commercial, and organizational environment that is almost unrecognizable from the perspective of standard church leadership theory and practice.
Although we often hear about successful attempts to revitalize existing churches, the overall track record is very poor. Ministers report again and again that their efforts at organizational change did not yield the promised results. Instead of managing new, revitalized, organizations, they ended up managing the unwanted side effects of their efforts. At first glance, this situation seems paradoxical. When we observe our natural environment, we see continuous change, adaptation, and creativity; yet our
Monday, 16 March 2009
Little fish, little pond
(And it came to pass by me ..)
Many of us spend time and energy trying to convince ourselves, and others, that we are big fish in small ponds or even bigger fish in larger ponds. The reality is we are little fish in little ponds, spending our lives with no idea what may be beyond our immediate experience or long-held beliefs. Most often, we are unable to even consider the possibility of there being another ‘reality’ (pond) out there.
Why don’t you venture out to see if there is a larger pond? Maybe because you feel content, secure and in control in your little pond (or you think you are)? Maybe you’re obsessed with trying to make your pond work for you and are intimidated by the unknown? Maybe you tell yourself you have no interest in exploring anything beyond what you know already?
I suspect most people fall into reason number two: they fear the unknown and feelings of separation from what gives them a (mostly false) sense of security. In their small ponds, they try to create a life of order and control, all the while experiencing stress, anxiety and insecurity.
Why not try a different pond?
What would it be like to venture into a different pond? To give up the need to be in control and swim outside the safe boundaries of the familiar?
What if you were to leave behind your life preservers—ego, beliefs, preconceptions and habitual judgments—and swim into a new pond with an open mind and an open heart? Could you trust that you won’t drown or lose your way?
The deal is this. You can’t think your way into a new pond. You have to let go and dive in. You have to take the risk.
Would you try?
Would you be willing to experience a new pond to find greater well being, fresh possibilities and a new sense of groundedness? If so, the first step is to explore your little pond, taking stock of your habits, beliefs, addictions and self-limiting thoughts. What are you, a little fish in this little pond, attached to and obsessive about? What drives you to want the sense of control and security you try to get from staying with what you know?
Once you uncover what drives you, and choose to let go of your ego needs to control and possess, you are on your way to transforming into a trusting fish that is ready to swim into another pond; a pond where your sense of identity can come from a deeper place, not just your limited mind and ego.
Could you swim with your eyes open?
In this new pond, you’ll need to swim with greater consciousness, always alert and awake. You will need to accept your vulnerability and stay away from self-destructive beliefs, illusions and fantasies. You will need to
trust and let go of dogmatic thoughts and beliefs. You will need to be open to change; to reconsider re-prioritizing your goals so they truly support your balance and well-being (not just your ego).
Moving to a new pond means allowing your ‘neutral mind’ to stay clear from being muddied by worry, goals, judgments, invidious comparisons and constant chatter. This new pond of clear water is still, peaceful and relaxed. You can be open to new experiences. You can be mentally and emotionally at peace, just so long as you keep it free from mud and scum.
Consider this. There is no bigger pond, no better pond—just one pond, where we can all swim in the stillness of the moment, free from the hustle and bustle and nagging of our ego-driven concerns. All it takes is to let yourself go there.
Many of us spend time and energy trying to convince ourselves, and others, that we are big fish in small ponds or even bigger fish in larger ponds. The reality is we are little fish in little ponds, spending our lives with no idea what may be beyond our immediate experience or long-held beliefs. Most often, we are unable to even consider the possibility of there being another ‘reality’ (pond) out there.
Why don’t you venture out to see if there is a larger pond? Maybe because you feel content, secure and in control in your little pond (or you think you are)? Maybe you’re obsessed with trying to make your pond work for you and are intimidated by the unknown? Maybe you tell yourself you have no interest in exploring anything beyond what you know already?
I suspect most people fall into reason number two: they fear the unknown and feelings of separation from what gives them a (mostly false) sense of security. In their small ponds, they try to create a life of order and control, all the while experiencing stress, anxiety and insecurity.
Why not try a different pond?
What would it be like to venture into a different pond? To give up the need to be in control and swim outside the safe boundaries of the familiar?
What if you were to leave behind your life preservers—ego, beliefs, preconceptions and habitual judgments—and swim into a new pond with an open mind and an open heart? Could you trust that you won’t drown or lose your way?
The deal is this. You can’t think your way into a new pond. You have to let go and dive in. You have to take the risk.
Would you try?
Would you be willing to experience a new pond to find greater well being, fresh possibilities and a new sense of groundedness? If so, the first step is to explore your little pond, taking stock of your habits, beliefs, addictions and self-limiting thoughts. What are you, a little fish in this little pond, attached to and obsessive about? What drives you to want the sense of control and security you try to get from staying with what you know?
Once you uncover what drives you, and choose to let go of your ego needs to control and possess, you are on your way to transforming into a trusting fish that is ready to swim into another pond; a pond where your sense of identity can come from a deeper place, not just your limited mind and ego.
Could you swim with your eyes open?
In this new pond, you’ll need to swim with greater consciousness, always alert and awake. You will need to accept your vulnerability and stay away from self-destructive beliefs, illusions and fantasies. You will need to
trust and let go of dogmatic thoughts and beliefs. You will need to be open to change; to reconsider re-prioritizing your goals so they truly support your balance and well-being (not just your ego).
Moving to a new pond means allowing your ‘neutral mind’ to stay clear from being muddied by worry, goals, judgments, invidious comparisons and constant chatter. This new pond of clear water is still, peaceful and relaxed. You can be open to new experiences. You can be mentally and emotionally at peace, just so long as you keep it free from mud and scum.
Consider this. There is no bigger pond, no better pond—just one pond, where we can all swim in the stillness of the moment, free from the hustle and bustle and nagging of our ego-driven concerns. All it takes is to let yourself go there.
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